Did You Ever Just Watch?

Yesterday started out in a totally unexpected way... I was leaving Erin's apartment at CU as I had stayed the night b/c I was way too tired to drive home that night after watching Die Hard... So as I was leaving, this guy who was re-paving the sidewalk at CU said to me, "Rachael?" I said, "No." Then he said, "Glenn ____" (for sake of privacy, I'm leaving that blank). I said, "Yeah, that's my dad. How do you know him?" He replied, "He was my mentor when I worked with him at ______." I was floored. He said, "You used to have short hair, right?" "Yeah, I did." That was like 5 years ago! He recognized me after having not seen me for at least 5 years! He proceeded to tell me that he started a ministry in India where he opened an orphanage and community center, started a church and also an outreach ministry to rescue girls from prostitution. He told me that he works for three months for this construction company to earn money, then goes back to India (where he was adopted from) to work on his ministry for three months. He flips back and forth. Orphan care and adoption has been a passion of mine for a long time, so to hear what this man is doing, totally blew me away. Very cool. Why did God have our paths cross again? I don't know for sure as I'm still sorting thru it mentally, but one thing that it did teach me is how God works. He continues to amaze me. What a way to start a morning.

But that experience soon faded as I allowed the worries of this life to consume me. I always wonder what the future holds... Should I go back to school for my masters to be an NNP (neonatal nurse practitioner)...? but that entails giving up much of my current life to do so b/c nursing school entails having no life but studying and working. Yeah, no fun... And I'm just starting lasting friendships that I don't want to lose. I am also really starting to live, I mean REALLY LIVE my life. This has been the best summer I have had in a long time. I am thoroughly enjoying it to the fullest. I'm spending as much of my time with my friends as possible and loving it! So... if not school right now, then what does God have in store for me for the future? Is Mr. Right right around the corner? There are times I just wish he would just sweep me off my feet and take me off into the sunset... But God is teaching me a lot about patience and waiting on His timing (not mine) in this area of my life. But then I feel the pressure from friends... pushing me to go out on blind dates or to go out with any single guy that may walk into my life. I hate that. Why is there so much pressure for a young single woman to get married off right away to any potential suitor? I know my heart and am trying listen to God... So please stop pushing me and therefore confusing me when it comes to following GOD's lead. Why am I not allowed to interact with single guys my age w/o the expectations... W/o being asked later, "Is he single?" Who cares! Yeah, I really do care and wonder when I talk w/ them, but that's normal for any 20-someting chic. But, I won't flirt with every guy that walks into my life. It's just not me. I have too much respect for guys to do that. I have too much respect for myself as well as for God to do that. Sorry, I'm just a little frustrated here... Yeah, I'm slow, picky and will not say yes to anyone. I won't just give any guy the key to my heart... It's too precious, too sacred. I want to save myself wholly for my future husband. I'm choosing to wait. To wait on God's timing... not my own, not my friends'.

My day doesn't end there though...

So after all that turmoil running thru my mind, I decided to go rollerblading last night to relieve some stress and to clear my head. Thought I was only going to go half the distance as I was fairly tired, but then went a little farther and then went the whole eight miles. On my way back home, the sunset was amazing. Did you ever just watch the sunset? I mean really watch the sun set... I was on a main street skating and I just stopped right where I was and watched the sun set. It was so cool. I was leaning against a telephone pole b/t the sidewalk and street. Cars were going by, people jogging by, people biking by. ...I'm sure wondering what I was doing. But I didn't care b/c it was just me and God. He calmed my spirit. He filled me with His peace. His presence. God brought me out that far into the country to fill me with His spirit of peace. After the sun set, God smiled. How do I know? B/c at that exact moment, a smile filled my face. God was pleased as His beauty filled the earth as well as my soul ...for He had filled me with His peace.

Montego Bay, Jamaica